My late friend, Caroline, arrived yesterday. I knew she was coming. I got a call from a friend of hers that I met the last time I saw her. Caroline died on December 7th last year in Colorado. Her memorial service was May 17th, the day we left for Vermont for my Father-in-law's memorial - he died on New Year's Eve. I had planned to make Caroline's send-off in Ouray until the plans were made for Tom's Dad. I hated to miss hers. But yesterday the package arrived; a program from her Memorial Celebration, a collection of her poems, a DVD she made about planning her own funeral while she was fighting cancer with every cell of her body, and a small double-bagged ziplock bag, wrapped in bubble wrap containing a gray-white powder, a small bit of the cremated remains of my childhood friend, entrusted to me to scatter or hold however I thought appropriate. What a gift. I think it says something about my friend that she so literally shared of herself. She was a gift. She absolutely lit up a room with her enthusiasm.
For now, I will find a nice box to keep her in. I don't know where to take her, our childhood camp is not really an option anymore. I could take her to the Bamberger Ranch in Blanco County, which is the last place I saw her alive. It was a wonderful day. We hiked Enchanted Rock, as far as she could go, lunched in Fredericksburg and dropped in on the Bamberger's for an impromptu tour and spent the rest of the day. It was beautiful and such fun. She was on mega doses of steroids and had tons of energy, but she had pain from a radiation burn that affected her ability to get around. She was positively manic and we had a blast. She didn't sleep much on the steroids, there was too much she wanted to do - too many people she wanted to reconnect with. I can't believe I let 30 years of my life go by without Caroline in it and I am so grateful that she found me again before she left the world. It was Caroline who took me to my first concert, John Prine and Steve Goodman at the Majestic Theatre in Dallas. I was 14, she was 16 so she could drive. To this day I am a die-hard John Prine fan. Caroline was in the car when I got my first ticket for speeding, 90 in a 70 on our way to camp the first weekend in May, I was 16. I was so scared - it ruined the entire weekend for me because I dreaded facing my parents with the news. I still remember it like yesterday. I have yet to watch her dvd. One day.
The summer is upon us in a big way, the temps are way too high for the season - we still have a month before the start of summer and we are closing in on triple digits. The garden is rebelling. I may get nothing until fall. I am aching to buy an above ground pool so I can teach Abby to swim this year, but really can't afford it yet. Abby's last day of school is today and we are making plans for her to have a fun summer. There have been promises of a brief trip to the coast sometime. Oh, and I made a pair of socks. For my friend Frank who I have teased with my praise of the handknit sock.
Oh, sweetie . . . that IS quite a gift, and your tribute here made me well up with tears and vow to call my best childhood friend right after work.
It also put that Neil Diamond song firmly in my head (which is ok with me -- I love that song).
And yeah, what's up with the weather?? I'm not ready for summer yet!
Posted by: chris | May 29, 2008 at 04:42 PM
Welcome back! I was just wondering today where you have been. Last day of school here too - Patrick is trying (but not very hard) to find his first job.
So lucky to have childhood friends. We moved so much when I was a kid that I really don't still know anyone other than my family from before about age 17.
Posted by: Katy | May 29, 2008 at 06:28 PM
Caroline sounds like a terrific friend; you were lucky to have each other. I'm looking forward to watching the video; that kind of planning makes it sound like Caroline and I have something in common.
Posted by: Donna | May 29, 2008 at 06:34 PM
Good to see your post mentioning your first concert of Steve Goodman and John Prine. Goodman often doesn't get his due. You might be interested in my 800-page biography, "Steve Goodman: Facing the Music." The book delves deeply into the relationship between Prine and Goodman, and Prine is a key interviewee among my 1,050 sources.
You can find out more at my Internet site (below). Amazingly, the book's first printing sold out in just eight months, all 5,000 copies, and a second printing of 5,000 is available now. The second printing includes hundreds of little updates and additions, including 30 more photos for a total of 575. To order a second-printing copy, see the "online store" page of my site. Just trying to spread word about the book. Feel free to do the same!
Clay Eals
1728 California Ave. S.W. #301
Seattle, WA 98116-1958
(206) 935-7515
(206) 484-8008
[email protected]
http://www.clayeals.com
Posted by: Clay Eals | May 30, 2008 at 01:39 PM
Good to see your post mentioning your first concert of Steve Goodman and John Prine. Goodman often doesn't get his due. You might be interested in my 800-page biography, "Steve Goodman: Facing the Music." The book delves deeply into the relationship between Prine and Goodman, and Prine is a key interviewee among my 1,050 sources.
You can find out more at my Internet site (below). Amazingly, the book's first printing sold out in just eight months, all 5,000 copies, and a second printing of 5,000 is available now. The second printing includes hundreds of little updates and additions, including 30 more photos for a total of 575. To order a second-printing copy, see the "online store" page of my site. Just trying to spread word about the book. Feel free to do the same!
Clay Eals
1728 California Ave. S.W. #301
Seattle, WA 98116-1958
(206) 935-7515
(206) 484-8008
[email protected]
http://www.clayeals.com
Posted by: Clay Eals | May 30, 2008 at 01:39 PM
That's heavy, Julia, and sad and wonderful and such a nice homage to your friend. Thanks for sharing it.
Posted by: Susan | May 30, 2008 at 09:07 PM
Caroline sounds like a special person and a wonderful friend. It also sounds as if you deserved her as much as she did you. I'm so sorry for your loss, this is a wonderful tribute.
Posted by: Teresa C | May 30, 2008 at 09:41 PM
What an amazing package to receive. It was so nice that you two were able to have that special day to remember - that photo is fantastic. I'm really sorry for your recent losses.
Posted by: Nancy | June 06, 2008 at 04:24 PM